英语笑话大全

“You’ll have to take care of the baby today,” a woman told her husband, I’m not feeling well.”
“今天你得照看孩子，”女人对丈夫说，“我今天不舒服。”

“Apple pie. Have a bite?” said the sentry, good-naturedly.
哨兵和气地说：“苹果馅饼，来一口怎么样？”

The man put out his tongue and the doctor looked at it quickly.
那人伸出舌头，医生很快地看了看。

Bobby: Dad, I’m too tired to do my homework.
博比：爸爸，我太累了，不想做功课。

Teacher: I hope didn’t see you looking at someone else’s paper, Jack.
教师：杰克，我希望我刚才没看见你偷看别人的试卷。

Dentist: Please stop howling. I haven’t even touched your tooth yet.
牙医：请你不要再嚎叫了！我还没碰你的牙呢。

“Ask your mother,” came the reply. “She puts everything away.”
“问你妈妈去，”他回答道，“她把东西都收起来了。

Two friends were out hunting and one was always bragging about what a good shot he was.
两个朋友外出打猎，其中一个总是夸耀自己的好枪法。

An American touring in the Sahara was dressed in a bathing suit. An Arabian gazed at him in amazement.
一位美国游客正身着泳装在撒哈拉沙漠观光。一个阿拉伯人惊奇地看着他。

Mother: Why were you kept after school today, Johnny?
妈妈：今天放学后你为什么要被留下来，约翰尼？

“她管她的那只狗和她丈夫都叫同一个昵称，肯定会经常造成混乱的。”

什么！又要买一件新衣服？你有没有想过我去哪儿弄钱给你买衣服呢？