英语笑话大全

One’s wife could not read the thermometer, but she took her husband’s temperature with it and gave a call to the doctor. 
某人的妻子看不懂体温计，但她用体温计量了量丈夫的体温，然后给医生打电话。

“You’re sacked.”
“你被解雇了。”

“There’s a leaky roof in my office.”
“我办公室的屋顶漏水。”

A boastful American from Texas was being shown the sights of London by a taxi-driver.
一位来自得克萨斯州喜欢自吹自擂的美国人正在出租车司机的带领下参观伦敦的景点。

There was once a local government official who loved his only son very much.
曾经有一个地方政府官员非常爱他的独子。

Mother: I sent my little boy for two pounds of plums and you gave him a pound and a half.
母亲：我给我的小儿子要了两磅李子，而你给了他一磅半。

A neighbor told us about a trip he took with his two-and-a-half-year-old son.
一位邻居告诉我们，他和两岁半的儿子一起旅行。

“Is ink so expensive, father?”
“墨水这么贵吗，爸爸？”

Dick’s mother made it a rule that if he came to the dinner table late again he w as not to speak a single word during the meal.
迪克的母亲立了一条规矩，如果他再次迟到，他在吃饭时一句话也不能说。

In the train Nick often put his head out of the window.
在火车上，尼克经常把头伸出窗外。

One day in class, the teacher assigned his students to write a composition—If I Am A Manager.
一天，在课堂上，老师让学生们写一篇作文——《如果我是经理》。

Teacher: Can you tell me anything about the great scientists of the 18th century?
老师：你能告诉我一些关于18世纪伟大科学家的事情吗？